


Latent Feelings

by AidenDorian



Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, M/M, Mental Healing, Mental Health Issues, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-03-30
Packaged: 2019-12-26 18:23:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18287759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AidenDorian/pseuds/AidenDorian
Summary: BJ shows up after a couple of years on Hawkeye's front porch. With everything going on, feelings are brought up and so is Hawkeye's health. Sidney is called into help Hawkeye out.





	Latent Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> I'm open to any constructive criticism. This was not beta read at all. If anyone has any suggestions (and maybe if I should continue this story in other chapters), just let me know.

It took BJ two years after the war ended and several calls to Father Mulcahy and Hawkeye to end up in Maine. He had only a small bag by his side when he finally knocked on an old friend's door. The lanky, slightly graying haired doctor opened the door. The two of them looked at each other for a few moments. 

“Welcome to Crabapple Cove Beej,” Hawkeye said, allowing the other to come into his house. 

"Thanks for letting me stay here. It was getting nasty in California," BJ said, still holding onto his bag. 

“You know when you’re going to see Erin?” Hawkeye asked.

BJ shrugged. He wasn’t too sure how the custody was going to go, but he just wanted the best for the now four-year-old.

The two of them stood in the small entryway after Hawkeye closed the door. For the first time, silence fell between them. It was a comfortable one at the very least. 

It took Hawkeye almost no time to help BJ get settled into a small spare room that was close to his own. With BJ’s bag on the mattress that was on the floor, the two men found themselves in the kitchen. They sat across from each other at the small dining table. 

“I may still have Sidney’s number if you need any help,” the lanky doctor said.

“You still talk to him?”

“He makes me call him every week. Part of his outpatient treatment.”

The other doctor calculated it up to a lot of phone calls. And that his friend was still going through some things in his mind. It wasn't unusual for what they had gone through. Granted, BJ had only known Hawkeye for part of the war. The mustached doctor made a mental note to find a way to get in contact with Trapper John. 

Both men slumped into their chairs. Silence fell between them again.

“I wasn’t as crazy as I was in Korea,” Hawkeye said, breaking the silence. 

“I believe you. I trust you and Sidney would have duked it out by now,” BJ said with a small smile. 

Hours of small talk passed before them. Soon night fell outside the small house. BJ looked out the window to see the clarity of the stars in the sky. It had been years since he had seen that. 

Hawkeye smiled when he saw BJ look at the sky. He rested his chin on one of his fists. It didn’t bother him that the other, in an instant, could turn his head and see that he was staring. It didn’t bother him at all.

For a moment or two, the other man didn’t seem to notice. Once he did, BJ turned to look at the other man. A smile graced his face once again. 

“We should head to bed,” BJ said, standing up from the chair. 

“Why do we have to go to bed? Because it got dark outside?” Hawkeye asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"Well, I'm tired. I traveled across the country to get here," BJ said, going to the doorway of the room. 

“I’ll see you in the morning then,” Hawkeye mentioned before he watched his friend leave to go to bed. 

Hawkeye ran his fingers through his hair. He looked at the clock on the stove. Green numbers stared back at him. He eventually got up and went to his phone. He numbly dialed the number to Sidney’s house. 

Of course, Sidney answered the phone half asleep. The surgeon was used to it by now and so was Sidney. It was something that the two of them had grown accustomed to. 

The two men talked for a couple of hours. Most of it revolved around Hawkeye’s latent feelings that a war friend had shown up at his house. Sidney had managed to calm Hawkeye down enough to not do anything too serious. 

Sidney managed to get Hawkeye off the phone. The lanky man meandered off to bed. He tossed and turned in the lonely bed before he eventually went to the spare room where BJ was sleeping.

“What are you doing up still?” BJ asked drowsily. 

“Can’t sleep,” Hawkeye said in a hushed tone. 

BJ groaned as he made enough space for him to crawl in. The dark-haired man finally could go to sleep. His friend watched for no more than half an hour. 

He began to wonder how long Hawkeye had been alone even before the war. He let a quiet sigh escape his mouth before going back to sleep. 

Sun began to filter through the window just above the mattress. BJ, of course, was the first man to begin to stir. Hawkeye was still sleeping with his back to his friend. The mustached man didn’t want this sight to end. It was something that he wanted to hold onto. A smile crossed his face. Of course, all good things had to come to an end. 

BJ gently put a hand on the shoulder of the other, causing Hawkeye to jerk away. The lanky doctor sat straight up. As he did that, he was kicking the sheets off. His friend wrapped his arms around his chest, firmly catching the other in mid-movement. 

“It’s just me Hawkeye. You’re in Maine,” BJ whispered in his ear. 

His words seemed to have calmed his friend down enough that restraint wasn’t needed. The mustached doctor was the first to get off the mattress. Pulling the others’ arms, he managed to get Hawkeye off the bed. 

“Let’s get some food in you,” BJ said, allowing his friend to lean against his shoulder. 

“I’m not hungry Beej,” Hawkeye mumbled as they made his way into the kitchen. “Why are you in your underwear?”

“We were sleeping,” the other man explained before setting the other in a chair that was close by. 

Before Hawkeye could respond, the back of BJ's hand was on his forehead. The saner of the two noticed a rising temperature. A concerned look appeared on his face. 

“Have you been taking care of yourself Hawkeye?”

“Of course, I have,” Hawkeye said; a look of insult coming across his face. 

BJ raised an eyebrow. He didn’t quite believe it. His disbelief showed itself to his friend who quickly recounted everything. He hadn’t been doing fine. Everything mentally had gotten worse for him. And, of course, his physical health took a back burner. 

A sigh escaped BJ’s mouth before he asked, “Where are your keys?”

Hawkeye motioned to the keys that were on the kitchen counter. The dust around them signaled to the other man that he had not gotten out in a while. BJ nodded as he glanced at the keys. 

“I’ll get dressed and then we go to the hospital,” he said, leaving Hawkeye alone temporarily. 

BJ came back to see Hawkeye blankly staring at the ground. The man grabbed the keys from the counter. Helping his friend out of the house, he walked out of the house. 

The gentlemen doctors found themselves at the nearest hospital. BJ got everything settled at the front desk before sitting next to Hawkeye in the waiting room. 

“Why are you doing this Beej?” 

“You’re my best friend. I can’t stand the thought of you dying before me,” BJ said with a little shrug. 

Hawkeye looked at his friend. The man did seem honestly concerned with his health and well-being. 

It took longer than they expected to have Hawkeye seen by one of the many doctors. Of course, Hawkeye was going to fight tooth and nail against everyone in the room. BJ was the only one that he would listen to and wasn’t in the room. 

“Sir, can you come into the back to help your friend out?” a nurse asked, finally catching BJ’s attention.

BJ nodded and followed the nurse to Hawkeye's examination room. Upon seeing his friend, the dark-haired man visibly calmed down. 

“We’re not here for you to fight treatment,” BJ said when he entered the room. 

“But he’s a quack. He’s as bad as Frank!” Hawkeye said, pointing a shaky finger at the presiding officer.

BJ raised an eyebrow before looking at the third man in the room. All he did was nod towards his friend. He was going to get the all but agitated man checked out. 

It took a few more minutes for the doctor to determine that Hawkeye was not as malnourished as BJ presumed. Hawkeye was finally let go and both men went to the car that they had traveled in. 

“Thanks for bringing me Beej,” Hawkeye said as they sat in the car. 

“When’s the last time you called Sidney?” BJ asked as he turned the engine over. 

“Sometime last night,” Hawkeye said, pulling a leg up to his chest. 

BJ nodded and the two of them went to Hawkeye’s house. The ride was relatively quiet for the two of them. BJ helped his friend into the house and onto the couch that was in the living room. 

“I need Sidney’s phone number,” BJ said as he handed his friend a scrap piece of paper and a pen.

Hawkeye stared at his friend. He glanced down at the paper and pen. He slowly reached for both. It took him a minute to write down the psychiatrist’s number. As soon as he did, he handed it back to his friend.

BJ took the piece of paper and went to the phone in the kitchen. He was hesitant about calling Sidney for various reasons. Taking a few deep breaths, he dialed the phone number he was given. 

“What’s wrong this time Hawkeye?” Sidney’s voice greeted him. 

“Actually, it’s BJ. I’m calling on behalf of him though. I’m worried about it him though,” the surgeon said.

“Is he breaking down again?” 

“I think so. We just got back from the hospital. He’s not looking too well.”

"Hmm. I'll make arrangements to come down and take a look for myself. Thanks for the call BJ." 

With that, the two men hung up the phone. BJ ran his fingers through his hair. This was getting to be more than he had expected.

He made his way to the fridge. The man was going to fix them both a quick meal. It wasn’t going to be much as Hawkeye didn’t have much food in the fridge or the cabinets.

It didn’t take long for two sandwiches to be made. BJ carried the plates into the living room. A smile appeared on his face when he noticed Hawkeye curled up on the couch. Setting the plates on the table, BJ woke up his friend up.

“I made you a sandwich. You do need to eat more,” BJ said quietly. 

"What did Sidney say?" Hawkeye asked, sitting upright on the couch. 

“Don’t worry about that right now,” the other man said, setting a plate on Hawkeye’s lap.

Hawkeye gave him a small smile. It didn’t take long for the both to eat their sandwiches. With both plates on the table in front of them, the tv was playing softly. 

“Why are you doing all of this Beej?”

BJ looked at Hawkeye for a moment before finally saying, “Because I love you. Why else would I divorce my wife and move across the country?”

Hawkeye let a small noise escape his throat. He put his head on BJ’s shoulder. The other man glanced down at his friend. Relief washed over him. He hadn’t been rejected like he thought he would. And for a moment, he felt like he was doing the right thing. 

“What is it that you love about me?” 

“I thought everything was a given,” BJ said, turning his attention to the television again. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

That question alone earned a hearty laugh from the other man. BJ wrapped his arm around Hawkeye’s shoulder. The two of them sat in comfortable silence. That is until the phone began to ring. 

BJ stood up and went to answer it. Sidney had apparently been quick to make arrangements to come out to see Hawkeye. The psychiatrist knew how much Hawkeye's mental health was to BJ. 

 

“We’re all worried about you Hawkeye,” Sidney said as the two of them sat in Hawkeye’s living room.

It was a couple of days after he had arrived in Maine. He had noted already that the other man wasn’t going to open up as easily. The two men stared at each other for a few moments. 

“I know. It’s not something that I’m really up to sharing,” Hawkeye said, looking at the ground. 

“Maybe you should. It might be good for you,” the psychiatrist noted. “Maybe BJ could help you out.”

Hawkeye sighed before saying, “I know. I don’t need BJ worrying about me more though.”

“I know. That’s why I’m here,” Sidney said, smiling his all-knowing grin.

Sidney was able to get Hawkeye to tell him what was on his mind. Nightmares about what had happened in Korea plagued him still. The psychiatrist nodded before scribbling something on a piece of paper. He pushed it over to Hawkeye. 

“This should help you,” Sidney said in a quiet voice. 

Hawkeye looked at the paper to see a prescription written on it. 

He smiled before saying, “Thanks Sidney.”

The two men stood up and shook hands. Hawkeye showed Sidney to the door. Moments after Sidney left, BJ came down the hallway from the bedroom.

“Everything okay?” BJ asked, accidently making Hawkeye jump.

“Yeah everything’s perfectly fine,” Hawkeye said, closing the door.

BJ nodded. He closed the gap between the both of them. He grasped Hawkeye’s cheeks. As he stroked the man’s cheeks with his thumbs, BJ pressed his lips to the others as gently as he could. A smiled formed on both of their lips as the kiss broke apart.

“Thanks Beej.”

“Let’s get this prescription filled okay?” BJ asked, gently grabbing the paper from his hand; “Then we get Erin for the summer.”

The light almost instantly returned to Hawkeye’s blue eyes.


End file.
